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Monday, March 28, 2005

Here Comes The Bribe (Oops,I Meant Bride)

Praise the Prophets! Today is truly a glorious day! My favorite political/humor blogger,the awesome and mighty Frank J has proposed to his lovely beloved,SarahK.

All devoted and loyal Ronin knew this day was coming,but none of us expected it this soon.I woke up this morning,like every morning; feeling like crap and wanting to take my frustration out on some patchouli-drenched hippie.But as per my usual routine,I signed onto IMAO and saw the news.I actually got misty-eyed.I am almost always a skeptic and critic of marriage,but not this time.Frank and Sarah are the most suited couple since Ronnie and Nancy Reagan. (Thought I was gonna say Romeo and Juliet,didn't ya? ;)) Frank and Sarah are truly the bashert of the other,without a bit of doubt.

Now,with all that mushy stuff out of the way,I feel the need to discuss the material matters,such as location,catering,booze,etc.Frank is a Capitalist,like me,which means he wants to get the best he can for the lowest cost.But I am a bit concerned he may get too chintzy.

For example,Frank wants to get a bargain,but he shouldn't try and buy everything at one place,such as this:


Now,I know SarahK doesn't drink,but Frank and most of his buddies do,so there must be booze at the wedding.There should certainly be high class booze,like Crown Royal,Jack Daniels,and Ezra Brooks.But Frank will hopefully not place quantity over quality by shopping at some joint like this:


Both Frank and Sarah are pretty dadgum religious (which I love about them),and both honor G-d truly and deeply.However,Frank does have a rather secular sense of humor,and may be inclined to save money and reserve a reception spot in a place that Miss K-soon-to-be-Mrs.J would not approve of.An example of such a bad location,would be like this:

Satan's Kingdom

But heck,Frank has class and good taste (look who he's marrying),so I know he won't be a goofy goof making the arrangements and plans. (Or will he?) BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

In all seriousness though,this is truly a great bonding.I've "known" Frank since I became a loyal and daily reader in August,and he is one the best men anyone will ever meet.His parents raised him right,and he is a strong individual,loyal to his faith,family,and country.

I don't "know" Sarah so well,but I know enough to say as a fact she is of equal caliber (pun intended) to Frank,and she is gonna be an awesome wife and mother.Plus,she owns guns and knows how to use them.

I'm hopeful but not confident,that they will name their second-born son after me.The first-born boy must be Frank III,of course.But I was thinking the second could be Moe J.How's that sound? Hmm...Moe J.That sounds familiar.Moe J.Where do I know that from? Moe J..Moe J..Moe J.Ohhhh..I remember what it sounds like.Let's not go there.Uh uh. :(

Best wishes and blessings of G-d to Frank J and SarahK.I truly hope you both have a long life together,full of happiness,health,and prosperity.


Moe von Ronin

BTW,some words of wisdom-There Comes A Time In Each Man's Life When He's Gotta Say No Ma'am ;)

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