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Location: Columbia, South Carolina, United States
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"Moe wouldn't trade me his chicken sammich for a nice, cool puppy smoothie. Indeed!"

- Glenn Reynolds

(This is a Filthy Lie)

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Wednesday, May 25, 2005

MoeBetta Headlines 05/25/05

Tax may drain world's top sperm bank

Elton John vows to beat them to it


Fisherman swaps rare turtle for Mercedes

New version of 'The Tortoise and the Herr'


Pigeon racers aim to brush up their image

Nonchalantly attempt to pass off pigeon poo as hair gel


Hardcore teddy banned from bear parade

Massachusetts senator pouts, blames Bush


Half-Ton Man Loses More Than 500 Pounds

First bowel movement in 15 months reduces Michael Moore's evilness by .002%


Unpaid Bill Leaves Man Stuck in Elevator

Clinton said "Screw'em!"


Woman Arrested for Having Crowded Car

Even more insulting, considering she was the only one in the car


Moose Wanders Into Michigan Cemetery

Archie, Jughead, Reggie fail to stop him


Swank, Lowe Say Phone Chats Help Marriage

Swank Lowe, sweet chariot, coming for to carry me home


Zellweger Gets Star on Hollywood Walk

Big boned ex-psychic says "I knew that skinny ass hussy weren't no good!"


Motley Crue Sues NBC

Band says "Even if we have to shout at the devil, we're gonna get a piece of your action!"


Mars Rover Spirit Finds Wet, Violent Past

Could have investigated Michael Jackson's bedsheets and come to same conclusion


Bush says tired of waiting on energy bill

Hillary says she gave up on that years ago


Calpine selling plants to reduce debt

Snoop Dogg makes similar business move



Enjoy! And swing on by and check out headlines at moehawk's, Dane's and Basil's!

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