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Location: Columbia, South Carolina, United States
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"Moe wouldn't trade me his chicken sammich for a nice, cool puppy smoothie. Indeed!"

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Wednesday, June 01, 2005

White Trash Wednesday 06/01/05

Now I seen for months, Basil, Cousin Red, Aunt Gladys, Oddybobo and many others, showin' off their white trashiness. That's all fine and dandy, cause it sure do give me a sense of culcheral pride. But what I ain't never seen amongst all them fine posts, is the proper use of duct tape. (Thought I called it "duck" tape,didn't ya? Ha! I ain't that stoopid)

Well, last week y'all might recollect me gettin' all uppity and ornery about my new air condishinner. Well, I never did say how fancy and fine I and El Bastardo put it in. The hard part was havin' a double paned plexyglass window what was busted out, and tryin' to make the new AC fit proper like. El Bastardo suggested braces, and supports, and this that and the other. I weren't havin' none of that. Ain't no reason to waste good lumber when ya got a brand new roll of duct tape and a fair sized chunk of styrofoam what come with the AC. I did eventually cave in and let him drill a little plank of wood across the panes, and stick a couple chains on for support. I figured it reminded him of buildin' rafts to get across the Rio Grande or somethin', so I didn't see no reason to deprive him of that moment of fond recollection of his early days of sneakin' in our country and stealin' our jobs.

Anyhoo, after push came to shove, we finally finished installing the AC like it was meant to be:


It all come out good and decent. I now have cool air, with only 3/4 the bugs I did before! So all you fancy "professional" handyfellas and installers, y'all can just pass me on by. I got somethin' better than your expertise; I got a roll of duct tape and free Mexican labor!

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